Hands up for hands!
I was once praised by an Ofsted inspector of my ‘meta cognitive’ approach to guiding children. “You what?!” It means; to give reasons to children as to why what they are doing may be wrong. It’s a challenging one. Within the classroom context a lively child may do many things ‘wrong’. Running around in a forest the child may be doing nothing ‘wrong’. Mmm, I better stop this piece sliding down a slippery slope discussing the morals of ‘disciplining’ children. So – stop!
So, the meta cognitive approach could be; “Jack, tipping on your chair could cause injury to your self and will disrupt your learning because you could be off school for a while if you injure yourself” (Apply a stern teacher / friendly parent/sarcastic tone as you wish…although the ideal tone is a balanced one that comes from a place of information not control towards the child). “ Burping on Anna means she has to smell your meal last night and probably makes her feel disrespected.” Instead of “ Jack, stop tipping on your chair”, and, “ Samir – you are being so disrespectful. Stop that!” You may choose to say those berating sentences too but adding an explanation does support the child, if we are to claim the role of being their guide as they grow, evolve, develop.
So this ‘meta cognitive’ approach in the classroom can work. The teacher has a knack with all the tricks, the brilliant way of keeping the jiggling children in line whilst hopefully teaching them ‘how to be.’ So, what about home? How can this approach be applied?
One tactic that I have found really works is to ‘shock’ children with an explanation that they have not heard about before, or thought of themselves. It’s a bit like tackling a topic side on. Creeping up on them bit by bit. They only realize they’ve been ‘set up’ after they’ve ‘got it’ and by then, they’ve had so much fun or been so enthralled that they would not even think they’d been duped. It’s about making it real, making it visual.
Here is where the ‘hands’ come in…….Your children are fighting. Maybe sometimes one of them often pushes and prods the other, or grabs, sometimes hurting their brother/s or sister/s.
Begin gently. “Open your hands out. Wow, they’re amazing aren’t they?! Of all the species on the planet humans are the only ones to have these incredible tools! They can give us nice feelings when we touch each other kindly, they can make things, they can hold things. Look! Fingers, thumbs. The only other creature with anything like hands are monkeys. And even though they are so incredible they still can’t do as many brilliant things as we can!” The children look at you as if you have gone a bit mad! You have not ‘told them off’ but seem to be going on about their hands. But they are interested. You continue to hold their interest…..
One captivating ‘trick’ I do with children is to simply do soft movements using my fingers and hands – rolling, twisting, turning, slowly, quickly. They copy. It’s mesmerising. It is hard to describe this. Investigate this ‘educational kinesiology’ at: www.braingym.org This is a program whereby teachers and children are trained to lead a 5 minute simple hand movement exercise. Any version of it works. Make up your own actions with your fingers and palms – it’s great fun!” Take it in turns to ‘follow the leader.’ The children become relaxed as they focus. You could use this as an exercise to show the children the simplistic wonder of their hands. Drama and creativity help embed any message you are trying to create.
If this topic is flowing, take it as far as you can. Involve the children in as many examples as you can as to what they could do with their hands. At the ‘end’ you bring in the punch line. You have essentially set up the whole of the previous 10-30 minutes (or more) to deliver this; “ So, why would any one want to do any thing negative with these clever hands?”
“ Hands are made for; being kind by stroking, showing friendship by holding hands, being creative by making things. The list goes on and on. Can you think of any more?
Hands are not made to hurt any one. Hands are for lovely and peaceful movements, not hurt or pain.”
Depending on the age of the children, this discussion can be extended in to creative artistic expression. For young children, simple hand prints are easy and pleasing. You can write in each finger what the child says; ‘Hands are for……’. For the older child sketches of the hand are also easy and powerful. Give them 5 minutes for a ‘close up’ (eg the thumb), then a ‘medium distance’ then ‘long distance’ – each of 5 minutes. The timing gives then a framework to put some outline down without being too wrapped up in perfection.
A simple display can be made of the work titled; – ‘Anna and Samir say “Hands are for….”
Any time after this if an incident occurs where there is prodding, pushing etc – take them to the drawings they have made. Ask them to tell you what hands are for. Ask them to tell you all the wonderful things they have done with their hands today. Practice the rap below.
At the end of that day, all of you together can moisturise your hands with some beautiful cream. Caring for their body in this way engenders self respect. This hopefully helps extend the respect to others.
So, explanations, visualisations, they all help a child to understand why we are trying to guide them.
Sometimes speech alone is not enough.
And most of all, fun and creative exploration bring families together. Have fun and try this little rap with your children. If there are 2 or more children split them in to two groups and make a fun ‘call and response from it’.
Hands up for hands!
I understand that;
They are for holding
Not for scolding,
They are for making
Not for taking,
They are for stroking
Not for poking,
Thumbs up for thumbs!
Hands up for hands!
I hope you found this article ‘handy’!
From Miss Rainbow.
© Rebecca Rainbow Elliott